You Forget Something, Like My Cut? The Sopranos and Scissors
They say two things are certain in life: death and taxes. I say there are actually a couple or three: death, taxes, and disagreement over The Sopranos ending. This series finale puzzle is notable for its connection to certain phrases and objects that appear throughout the show. One example is scissors. And what do scissors do best? Well, they cut (verbs like “snip” and “chop” work, too). Wait, The Sopranos and scissors?
(S2, E1) "Guy Walks Into a Psychiatrist's Office"
So, what’s my point exactly? Well, it was a fellow Sopranos super fan who brought the Made-In-America scissors to my attention in the first place. (side note-If you’d like to read his Paulie thesis, you can do so here). In any case, from that point on, I was picking up on another scissor or cutting reference in what seemed like every other episode. On that note, here are just some examples of The Sopranos and scissors:
"Paulie! Get the bolt cutters from out of the trunk!"
“I know one thing that no man wants to go through life without.” -Hesh Rabkin
“What? Oh…that’s a brilliant idea. Paulie, get the bolt cutters from out of the trunk!” -Tony Soprano
"Ally, what are you doing?!?"
Isabella's Cutting Into The Middle of Things
“If I had an ounce of self-respect, I would cut your d–k off!” -Carmela
In Case of Emergency, Use Closest Pair of Scissors
“Do I have your word that I’m in no physical danger?” -Dr. Melfi
“I’m humbled you would take my word, yes.” -Tony
[Dr. Melfi takes a pair of scissors and puts it up her sleeve in preparation for opening the door to let Tony in].
"All cutlery stays right where it is."
“Don’t yell. Don’t scream. All cutlery stays right where it is. How’s the bagels here?” -Tony
Danger: Carmela
I'm gonna tell him, no more cutting us out of the dream!
“But somebody forgot to tell the Man. You know what I mean! Oh, yes, I’m gonna tell him! I’m gonna tell him, no more cutting us out of the dream! No more!” -Reverend Herman James
Finishing Tony's Bris
“I’m supposed to get a vasectomy when this is my male heir?!” (referring to A.J.)
Richie Aprile Talks Scissors
“A lot of work to move picnic coolers. Coolers are like scissors: Everybody wants one, nobody has any idea how much they cost.” -Richie Aprile
Cutting Meadow Off
“I don’t know what’s going on. But if you wanna make a big scene at your daughter’s new college, then comb your hair and come right along. Embarrass her. Alienate her. Or better yet, cut her off. Let her drop out and go to a state school. Or maybe move back in here.” -Carmela Soprano
Avoid the Deck of the Queen Mary - You Might Get Cut
“See, when we operate, we have to decide how much healthy tissue to cut around
the tumor.” -Dr. Kennedy
Pie-O-My Gets Her Cut of the Winnings
“At least she stopped thrashing. That’s where the danger is. The intestines get twisted, and you have to cut.” -Veterinarian treating Pie-O-My
No Scissors, Bad Luck!
Doctor's Orders: No More Undercutting
“The most important thing is that you and Carmela are in agreement on the issues, that you don’t undercut each other or act at cross purposes.” -Dr. Melfi
"Barber scissors, right?"
Carmela Soprano's New Hair Cut
“Now, I know you need a break. Deep down, that’s probably the reason you got your hair cut.” -T
The First Cut is The Deepest
Welcome to the Chop Shop
“What if, instead of a pair of scissors, it was a meat cleaver?” -Christopher Moltisanti
Finally...
